Moving over here:
http://lasmariposasesperando.wordpress.com/
Please visit me there.
Thursday, January 14, 2010
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
It's been a while
I haven't posted in a while, reason being that after our first appointment with the doctor I didn't feel like we had a lot of hope. They made me feel old and barren. While I'm well aware of the fact that I'm passed my "prime" I didn't need to make me feel that way. Today we went for our follow up.
So the past couple of months we went on our way, doing all the tests we had to do. This included the dreaded HSG. Nothing like being in a room and spreading everything wide to show a bunch of strangers all your goodies. So that test went well, clear tubes and normal uterus. I had to get an ultrasound done, I guess to count follicles, and those were good for my age. Of course as well, I think I gave about 2 pints of blood for various blood tests. Everything came back normal.
So next steps, I was given a round of Clomid for when we are ready to start our treatments and that's up to us. I'm just ready to be a parent. Man I hope this happens quickly.
So the past couple of months we went on our way, doing all the tests we had to do. This included the dreaded HSG. Nothing like being in a room and spreading everything wide to show a bunch of strangers all your goodies. So that test went well, clear tubes and normal uterus. I had to get an ultrasound done, I guess to count follicles, and those were good for my age. Of course as well, I think I gave about 2 pints of blood for various blood tests. Everything came back normal.
So next steps, I was given a round of Clomid for when we are ready to start our treatments and that's up to us. I'm just ready to be a parent. Man I hope this happens quickly.
Thursday, November 12, 2009
Tomorrow
Tomorrow we start over with the doctors. I don't think we'll have too long of meeting with her . But I will shave my legs just in case.
Friday, November 6, 2009
And so
And so we've now come full circle. We are going to try the fertility treatment route again. In the spring when I found out our wait was going to be at least another year for our second adoption, I felt like we were being lead down the same path as our first adoption. I wanted to pull our file, I just wanted everything to be over, I didn't want this hanging over our heads anymore. I was tired and just wanted to live my life. I told DH that we'd tried everything and nothing was working. It wasn't meant to be. DH reminded me that we didn't try one route with our fertility treatments. I said that I would try it and then when (not if) that didn't work, we'd be done, we'd pull our file.
DH agreed. So that's where we are now. We've waited months for an appointment and now it's days away. I'm still not positive that it will work, it's been almost eight years of doing "the right thing" and nothing has worked. So we will see what these doctors have to say and where this next step towards our family take us.
DH agreed. So that's where we are now. We've waited months for an appointment and now it's days away. I'm still not positive that it will work, it's been almost eight years of doing "the right thing" and nothing has worked. So we will see what these doctors have to say and where this next step towards our family take us.
Thursday, October 29, 2009
The Story Continues
After our attempt at having a biological child failed, we took a few months to re-evaluate and decide what our next steps would be. It took me a months to grieve our infertility and the fact that we wouldn't have a biological child. I just couldn't bring myself to try IVF again. It reeked havoc with my body and I just couldn't do it again, emotionally or physically.
We decided in February 2006 to adopt. It was more important to me to be a mom than to be pregnant. We started the long process of our homestudy, including getting police checks, health checks, financial checks, references from our friends and family and meeting with a social worker to evaluate us. After eight months, our file finally made it's way to China. We hunkered down and waited for a referral and waited and waited. Our 1.5 year wait has now turned into a nine year wait according to our agency. To add insult to injury, the agency now wants to charge us a fee to have our file sit and collect dust.
We decided to proceed with another adoption, hoping the second one would be completed first and first one second so we would still have our two bean sprouts. We started the homestudy process all over again. Again, we waited and waited for our referral. We were told our wait would be eight months. Then it turned into 16 months, then 18. We started to seriously wonder if it was in the cards for us. Everywhere we turned there were more walls and more obstacles. We considered pulling both our files and living child free. Then three weeks later our second agency declared bankruptcy.
It felt like we were being taken for a ride by everyone, by doctors, social workers and adoption agencies. Now we really didn't know what to do next.
We decided in February 2006 to adopt. It was more important to me to be a mom than to be pregnant. We started the long process of our homestudy, including getting police checks, health checks, financial checks, references from our friends and family and meeting with a social worker to evaluate us. After eight months, our file finally made it's way to China. We hunkered down and waited for a referral and waited and waited. Our 1.5 year wait has now turned into a nine year wait according to our agency. To add insult to injury, the agency now wants to charge us a fee to have our file sit and collect dust.
We decided to proceed with another adoption, hoping the second one would be completed first and first one second so we would still have our two bean sprouts. We started the homestudy process all over again. Again, we waited and waited for our referral. We were told our wait would be eight months. Then it turned into 16 months, then 18. We started to seriously wonder if it was in the cards for us. Everywhere we turned there were more walls and more obstacles. We considered pulling both our files and living child free. Then three weeks later our second agency declared bankruptcy.
It felt like we were being taken for a ride by everyone, by doctors, social workers and adoption agencies. Now we really didn't know what to do next.
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
Here we go again...
Well, we're back at square one. What do I mean by that? It's a long story. Here's it is.
Almost eight years ago, we started to try for a family. Like many others, we assumed it would only be a few months before we would get a positive on the home pregnancy test and our child would be in our arms by the end of the year. But things don't always turn out the way we thought they would. After a year, we didn't have a child and became part of the dreaded 10-15% of couples that are classified as infertile.
We went to three different doctors to try to figure out what was happening. After another year, three doctors, intrusive exams and dozens of blood tests we had a diagnosis but no solution. We were referred to a reproductive endocrinologist. We tried IVF w/ICSI. Our first round resulted in a negative. We tried with some of our frozen embryos and got a pregnancy but miscarried at nine weeks. Our last few embryos resulted in a chemical pregnancy. We were absolutely devastated.
To be continued...
Almost eight years ago, we started to try for a family. Like many others, we assumed it would only be a few months before we would get a positive on the home pregnancy test and our child would be in our arms by the end of the year. But things don't always turn out the way we thought they would. After a year, we didn't have a child and became part of the dreaded 10-15% of couples that are classified as infertile.
We went to three different doctors to try to figure out what was happening. After another year, three doctors, intrusive exams and dozens of blood tests we had a diagnosis but no solution. We were referred to a reproductive endocrinologist. We tried IVF w/ICSI. Our first round resulted in a negative. We tried with some of our frozen embryos and got a pregnancy but miscarried at nine weeks. Our last few embryos resulted in a chemical pregnancy. We were absolutely devastated.
To be continued...
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